The Dark Side of Thanksgiving

I'm experiencing what can only be described as "turkey rage." Similar to road-rage, it involves a lot of unnecessary shouting, pushing, and general rowdiness. 
I have been eating turkey for 5 days straight. 
Paul loves to cook a turkey. After he finished his turkey in LA, he found an amazing deal on one around here. 
What does $10 buy you at our local Safeway?
Oh- just 22lbs of turkey.